Pregnancy During a Pandemic

I’m 41 weeks pregnant (well, really 41 weeks and 3 days pregnant!) and the COVID-19 pandemic is in full force.  Great timing.

Honestly, though, I’ve had a super easy pregnancy.  This is my first pregnancy.  When I was very early on in my pregnancy (late June), I was volunteering with my husband on a mission trip in El Salvador through Living Water International.  I didn’t notice any strange symptoms, but I did avoid my malaria pills since I knew that there was a possibility of pregnancy.

I forgot about the chance of being pregnant until mid-July when my period was significantly late.  I found out on July 12th (5.5 weeks pregnant at that point) and the following day, my husband and I ran a 5-mile race in our town.

Although I had some nausea during the first trimester, I believe that a large portion of that was simply due to the prenatal vitamin I had chosen.  Once I switched to a different brand after the first three weeks, the nausea was pretty much gone, and it had never been that terrible anyway.  I never threw up.  I mainly just had a tiny appetite, which caused me to lose some weight early on.

In August, we still traveled to the Grand Canyon North Rim for our one year anniversary.  The hiking was extremely difficult, but I’m not sure how much was a result of my pregnancy and how much was the result of being in a high altitude.  We had a great time visiting Las Vegas, the Grand Canyon, and Zion National Park.

In November, we traveled to Cabo, Mexico for a baby moon.  We hiked up a small mountain in Cabo called Mt. Solmar and again, I felt great on the hike.

I was still running up to my 33rd week of pregnancy, when it just became too uncomfortable.  Since my 34th week, I’ve been walking almost every day.  Since January 1st, I’ve walked 144 miles.  During the month of March, I haven’t missed a single day.  Most days I walk between 3-6 miles, which I’m so grateful for since I know that many women are extremely uncomfortable during their third trimester.

I was able to work my high school teaching job until reaching 38 weeks, which was my plan all along, and I didn’t need to take a single sick day.

Everything was going as planned.  But then we started hearing about the coronavirus.  Initially, I thought nothing of it.  I remembered the hype and fear-mongering surrounding H1N1, mad cow disease, and many other illnesses that did cause harm to some people, but did not live up to all of the drama in the media.

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Now it’s March 21st and I’m 10 days past my due date.  This coronavirus/COVID-19 is definitely putting a damper on things.  That easy pregnancy?  Yea, that’s now a thing of the past, as I cannot believe that I’m going to be delivering a baby in the midst of all of this craziness.

Back on my due date, things were still somewhat calm.  I wish our baby boy could have come on time or a little early to have avoided all of this, but I just have to trust God’s plan and His perfect timing.  On Wednesday, March 11th, there were some minor hospital restrictions, but nothing major.  My mom could have still come to see the baby.  My husband’s parents could have come one at a time to visit.  There were some extra precautions being taken, but not the way they are today.

That Friday, I found out that the hospital had implemented a no visitor policy.  My husband would be the only person allowed with me in the hospital.  When the woman on the phone told me that, I immediately started crying.  Although I hadn’t wanted extra people with me in the delivery room, I always expected my mom to be able to visit me in the hospital soon after my baby arrived.  My mom lives out of state, but she had planned to start driving down whenever I let her know that I would be going to the hospital.

Sure, I was happy that my husband would be with me, but I couldn’t believe that none of the grandparents would be able to visit.  Here I was thinking that was the extent of my problems.  Little did I know…

We kept guessing when our baby would show up, but almost nobody expected him to come this late (and at the time of writing this, I still don’t know whether he will show up tonight or in 5 days).

Then we started hearing about more cases of COVID-19 in New Jersey.  The numbers were increasing (and continue to increase) by a significant amount every day.

Then my school closed through April 20th (possibly even longer).  I had meticulously worked on my maternity plans, leaving copies of every assignment that was going to be completed through the last day of school in my classroom.  All of that was immediately useless since students would not be in the school for a long time.  The hours of work I spent, mainly unpaid, working on lesson plans and copies seemed to be a waste.

Then we started hearing about increasing numbers of deaths, one of whom was a parishioner at the Co-Cathedral of Saint Robert Bellarmine, the church where my husband and I had been running a young adult Bible study until January.

Then our Bishop decided to cancel all Catholic Masses until April 3rd.  As practicing Catholics, we were devastated by this news.  It’s currently Lent, which is when I go to church the most often.  Thank goodness that they are still having adoration of the Blessed Sacrament on Monday nights, but most of the other events such as stations of the cross and Mass have been cancelled.  I can’t believe that I cannot receive the Eucharist for weeks or possibly months.  I can’t believe that my newborn baby will not be attending Mass with us every weekend.

The bishop also said that we must cancel large gatherings, such as those that coincide with weddings, confirmations, and baptisms.  We had planned to baptize our baby very soon (ideally April or May), but now if we do that, it will probably be a small ceremony without most of our friends and family members able to be invited.

This past Wednesday, I went to my midwife for my 41-week visit.  Everything went well in terms of the fetal non-stress test in terms of the baby’s acceleration, so I was happy with that.  My blood pressure was fine.  I was 80% effaced, but still only 1cm dilated (which has been the same for the past 2 weeks), so my midwife was not thrilled about that, bringing up the word “induction” for the first time — something I would really like to avoid.

Then she explained another potential change at the hospital.  In the hopes of limiting the number of employees at the hospital for any given period of time, the hospital wants to implement a labor and delivery rotation schedule.  That means that 2 providers will be there at any given time for the delivery of babies, but it would be the luck of the draw which person we would get.

The whole reason we switched from an OB to a midwife is that we really want a natural birth and we know that midwives are less likely to push for medical interventions and C-sections.  They also stay with the laboring woman as much as possible, whereas OBs are barely there.  I liked the fact that the midwives would be with me and would help me through the breathing.  I liked that midwives are more likely to allow the birth to continue slowly rather than pushing interventions if I’m not dilating quickly enough.  They would be more likely to allow the pushing stage to happen more naturally rather than rushing through it, causing a major tear.  I cried again in the midwife’s office when she told me this news.  I don’t want to deliver with an OBGYN — especially one I’ve never met before.

Then she told me that she wants me to be induced on Monday, which will be 41 weeks +5 days.  I know that’s long, but pregnancies aren’t technically overdo until past the 42-week mark, not before it.  She wants the induction because of things getting worse at the hospital.  I haven’t decided for sure yet, but I really want to wait a little bit longer.  I still feel great.  My 41-week ultrasound came back normal.  My blood pressure is normal.  The baby’s heart rate is normal.  There is no medical reason to induce at this point.  Unfortunately, I was overwhelmed by this point at the appointment and my husband was not allowed in the office with me, so I didn’t ask many of the questions that I have now.

Today we were told that we will not have any Masses during Holy Week or Easter Sunday.  The Holy Triduum is my favorite week to be a Catholic.  Good Friday is my favorite service of the year.  I am thankful that there will be live streams of Masses, but never in my life have I been unable to attend the Easter services.  It is heartbreaking.

Later today we were told that the state of New Jersey is in a lockdown and that we should not be leaving our homes at all.  This was no surprise, as most of us are doing this anyway, but it’s definitely affecting my husband’s job negatively, which isn’t ideal timing since I’m on maternity leave and we’re moving into a new apartment in May.  We’re excited for the additional space, but it means that our rent and utility bills are going to be increasing.

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So here I sit, on the evening of Saturday, March 21st, 2020.  This pandemic is real.  It is frightening.  I feel selfish complaining about any of it, considering that my family is currently healthy and is still earning money.  I had two beautiful baby showers (I know multiple people now who have had to cancel theirs).  I don’t have to cancel a wedding.  I’m able to buy bulk food and household items that I need.  My husband and I have a savings account that we can use if it becomes absolutely necessary.  We’re in a good situation, all things considered.

However, I can’t help but feeling sad at times.  I’m fortunately not stressed out.  I know that nothing is in my control.  I know that God is with me and that He will help us all to get through this difficult time.  But I still feel sad to know that my first child is being born into this crazy time.  I know he won’t remember it and I know that we will have interesting stories to tell him as he grows, but right now it just sucks, plain and simple.

So welcome to being pregnant during the pandemic.  Not just pregnant, but 10 months pregnant during a pandemic.  I keep thinking that I will wake up and this nightmare will be over, but this is real life.  All we can do is pray, hope, and avoid worrying.  Worrying doesn’t help anything.  We will just take it one day at a time, hoping and praying that things will soon start to improve.

I pray for our family and for the health of our baby.

I pray for all of the medical professionals and people who are working to treat the patients who are currently sick and fighting for their lives.

I pray for the souls of all who have passed away as a result of the illness.

Jesus, we trust in You.  We know that You are greater than this pandemic and that You are there with us through every moment.  Help us to maintain faith even when things look bleak.  Help us to bring Your light to the world.  Maybe this time of difficulty will cause more people to seek You and to realize your glory.